Funny jokes

Chemistry Teacher:Can you give me the formula for water?
Chemistry Teacher:Where did you get an idea like that?
Student:You told us it was H’to’O.
Patientoctor,if a person’s brain stops working ,deos he die?
Doctor:How can you ask such a stupid question!You’re alive,aren’t you?

A man was given the job of painting white lines down the middle of the road.The first day he did 10 miles;the second day he did 4 miles;the third day he did less than a mile.His foreman was furious.’How come you’re doing less each day?”Because each day i get further away from the can of the paint.’

Employer:In this job we’re looking for someone who’s responsible.
Applicant:Then I’m your man.In my last job,whenever anything went wrong,they said I was responsible.

A wife who’d been married many times rushed up to her husband ,who had also been married many times.’Come quickly!’she said.’My kids and your kids are beating up our kids!’

Super Jokes

Teacher: Sam, when was Rome built?
Sam:It was built during the night.
Teacher:The night!Where did you ever get such an idea?
Sam:Well,everyone knows that Rome wasn’t built in a day.


Son:What has 50 legs,big blue eyes on stems, and a red body with green stripes?
Dad:I give up.What?
Son:I don’t know either, but it’s crawling on your collar right this minute.


Man 1:Money means nothing to me.
Man 2:In that case,the guy who just picked your pocket got away with nothing.

Waiter : George Washington once dined at this very table.

Diner : Is that why you haven’t changed the table cloth since?


A little girl’s grandmother was driving her car very rashly. ‘Don’t go around the corners so fast, grandma,she pleaded.’

‘Do what I do, dear,’ said the grandmother, ‘and close your eyes!’

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